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Welsh farts

  Thu 9th May 2024

I'm on the balcony of my new flat. it's in a quiet cul-de-sac in the city centre. A few years ago they put bollards up at the end of the road and it's eliminated all but residential traffic. There are a few shouty people, but lunatics are often energetic walkers, so their evangelism and advice rises and falls like a passage of bad music.

I bought a rusting old folding seat this afternoon for three quid from the junk shop down the road, so that I can sit and look at the sky, the trees, and the fat black cat who fearlessly walks along the wall separating our block from the council block opposite. In my old place, I opened my front door onto a corridor, which made it feel a bit institutional and stifled. Here, there is an outside. I face northwest, so I get the sun twice a day.


Yesterday I had a job interview for a railway job in C---. 7K rise, fewer hours, long weekends every six weeks, and the thing I want more than anything else -- a roster, so that I know what I'm doing more than three days in advance. (It'd be thirteen weeks in advance).

I was interviewed by two men, senior experienced railwaymen. I would far rather be interviewed by men. You can have a bit more banter with men and let your guard down a bit. The manufactured, pretty young women, with their nails and hair and smiles and cold friendliness, unnerve me. You can't break through. At the end, the men asked me if this was to be my only job. "Yes, it will. I've closed my Only Fans page down," and there was a bit of blokey chortling, with the knowledge that all three of us will be wanking at some point soon.

In the pub garden afterwards, a woman on the table behind me farted. "Fuck me, that was good for a woman," her male friend said. "That's why you're common," her female one said. It had me in tears of laughter. I turned to them and said "don't do that again love, I'll piss me pants on the train home."


I spent last weekend with Trina. The original plan was to go to Glasgow for a night on the bop and stay in a hotel. Rail Replacement Bus Services killed that plan, so I stayed at hers instead. We slept in separate bedrooms and mainly spent the weekend eating and drinking. I walked off with another man's coat from the pub, then in the morning, wondered how I had slimmed overnight. I returned it with an apologetic note and a lottery ticket, and he somehow found my email address and wrote back to me. It was all most gentlemanly. Less gentlemanly was me telling Mel nothing about staying with Trina.

6 comments »

6 comments

Comment from: exile on pain street [Visitor]

It’s a good thing you didn’t send the oversized coat to Mel and not say anything to the gent you took it from. Fireworks.

Hope you and your family are well, sir. Daughter #1 graduated from the Uni and got a proper job straight away. Imagine my relief! Daughter the second, who spend two weeks in a psychiatric hospital two years ago, was accepted into a Uni with honors. Long road for her. And me.

Sun 12th May 2024 @ 11:46 Reply to this comment
Comment from: looby [Visitor]

That’s great news about your daughters Exile! Hope things continue to move on up for them, and you can relax a bit (although you know, once a parent, always a parent!) All good wishes from over here.

Mon 13th May 2024 @ 03:29 Reply to this comment
Comment from: Scarlet [Visitor]

Yes, women do that cold thing to me too. I, on the other hand, am not very good at it.
Good luck for getting the job. Not sure what I feel about the Trina/Mel thing. Change Trina’s name to Trevor and all will be well.
Sx

Comment from: looby [Visitor]

Well I haven’t got the job, I’m still waiting to hear back from them. Things move slowly in Wales.

Thu 16th May 2024 @ 01:14 Reply to this comment
Comment from: kono [Visitor]

Good luck on the gig my friend, sounds a peach, more dosh, the occasional long weekends, fingers crossed! The new flat sounds lovely as well… nothing like a bevy and a smoke on the balcony as the sun sets ;)

and speaking of only fans, lol! a few years back i was talking to this woman as basketball tryouts, she had coached as well but then her kid didn’t make the team, fast forward and the boyo tells me about the woman i was talking to and how she quit her job and became a porn star, well fuck me (pun intended) she could have been my assistant coach ;) turns out she quit her corporate gig to do porn and only fans, Mrs. Robinson (origingal huh?) caused a big stir among the PTA set in the burbs… if only i had better luck lol!

Mon 20th May 2024 @ 05:46 Reply to this comment
Comment from: looby [Visitor]

Bloody ell, you do seem to have a knack of bumping into these fit as sporty women – ha ha that made me laugh. And it’s always good to hear of a tale that sets the blue rinse brigade twitching. All the best!

Sun 26th May 2024 @ 14:03 Reply to this comment


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