Kono – yes, it’s much better being on your own. I don’t like worrying about whether the other person wants to go home – because I’m out for the duration, and into the following afternoon. Re the gambling – I know someone who is meticulously accurate about his betting and his flat is lined with books about racing, and said he made £1250 in 2015 from it, and is thinking of trying to do it professionally. He commentates on racing and is a bit of an insider.

I fucking love sitting in a pub with the old fellas and putting little wee bets on. There’s such a lovely cameraderie.

Organgrinder — I once sat through a 3 hour show by Kitson and I was clenching my nails into my hands for something more interesting to feel.

What’s the age range at these fetes? Are you amongst the oldest (no offence intended). Mobile phones, FB and texting are wrecking society. I hate them. Wish I could stuff the genie back into the bottle. A 9 a.m. beer would wreck me. I’m so fragile. I hate it. Kono’s comments are the gold standard, don’t you think?

And i have told you the tale about taking a course at the community college on gambling on thoroughbred horses haven’t I? just another vice in my long list but i took this class years ago before the boyos were born from a professional gambler, near the end of the class he asked how long i’d been handicapping and i told him about a year, he said he’d been teaching the course a few years now and said he’d only told one other person they could make a living at it but that he thought i had the skill, eye, number crunching and gut instinct to do it for a living… i laughed like hell, from selling gear to pro gambler? i can’t say it didn’t cross my mind, great post sir!!

Although the SUV does put me off you a bit.

(Wendy Cope can bite me.)