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And here are the votes of the Lancaster jury

  Mon 16th May 2011

An enjoyable few days with the children, mainly at theirs, while Kirsty was away.

My daughters more or less run themselves now, dropping disdain on my fretting over the sandwich fillings in their packed lunches, telling me not to bother, as I'm "bound to get it wrong". "Well," I told Melanie, "you can make them yourself in the morning, but if you're not ready to get out through that front door by 8.15 you'll have to go hungry." It was my anxiety speaking, born of my feeling that a man doing childcare by himself has to reach higher standards than a woman in order to cut a decent figure in the playground.

The following morning, Melanie and her sandwiches were ostentatiously ready by 8am. She pointedly asked her sisters if they were ready to leave. Doltishly I didn't notice the way she was trying to impress and correct me. Remembering it the following day, I bought her a small bar of chocolate, wrapped it up, and gave it to her as a Getting Ready Early present.

Through rain at 45 degrees, we set out to buy the various vehicles for salt, sugar and hydrogenated vegetable fat which would constitute the food at our Eurovision party. Daddy got himself some Riesling. The printer gutterally refused to print our scorecards so we all had to write them out by hand. Melanie got in a temper because she couldn't do straight lines and deliberately snapped her pen. Melanie and Jenny voted for Denmark, Faye for Hungary; I was taken by the minidresses and coloured tights of Serbia.

Serbia Eurovision 2011

The next day, in a break in the rain, Faye and I went outside to play. We got one of those extra bouncy rubber balls and slammed it onto the street and watched it pinball down the road, bumping naughtily into cars. It bounced irretrievably into next door's garden and so, for the first time in decades, I had to knock on a neighbour's door and say "Excuse me, our ball has gone into your garden. Could we have it back please?"


Comment from: nuttycow [Visitor]

I was, naturally, going for Swtizerland and was thrilled to see the UK voted for them - sorry we didn’t return the compliment!

Mon 16th May 2011 @ 10:14
Comment from: [Member]

Hello nuttycow, nice to see you here. Don’t worry - the voting was a bit half cock because the juries were back. I can’t believe that the half drunk millions of Europe almost voted that Italian jazz-lite to the win. That must have been the juries. We only got 12 points off that erstwhile and well-known British ally, Bulgaria.

Switzerland though - the size of that woman’s waist was making me wince.

Mon 16th May 2011 @ 11:17
Comment from: smallbeds [Visitor]

Next year I am definitely having a Eurovision party. I can’t believe I missed Jedward, although we did just catch Moldova and their hats.

Tue 17th May 2011 @ 06:24
Comment from: [Member]

The Moldovan milliner definitely excelled him or herself.

Wed 18th May 2011 @ 02:23
Comment from: Tim Bivans [Visitor]

This is a great site, might you be interested in doing an interview regarding just how you created it? If so e-mail me!

Fri 29th July 2011 @ 20:49
Comment from: [Member]

Yes, but that would be a very short interview. It uses b2evolution software, a MySQL database and that’s about it. The content is just what happens to me.

Sat 30th July 2011 @ 02:37

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