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My mate fancies you
8 comments
You see, the thing is, women don’t care much about appearance. They’re a bit more evolved than we are. They care about the inners. And if he can be a good provider, all the better. We judge on looks. We can’t help it. It’s in our DNA.
Yes, I think we get the better deal out of that mismatch on the whole. Although it worred me when you said they’re looking for “…a good provider". Oh dear, that’s me single for a while then.
A woman once said to me, in the course of our splitting up, “You’re not chubby enough and you’ve got a funny face.” It’s reassuring to know that what she *really* meant was “I’ll come back when you’re a bit further on in your career.” :)
You know I thought ‘Sshh’ was all right (if not an instant classic) but I do admire your rigorous approach to quality control and (as should go without saying) have infinitely more trust in your axe-wielding motives than those of that Australian bloke (although I was interested to hear the balanced and non-condamnatory judgements of Murdoch expressed by the editor of the Guardian on Newsnight last night- in his place I’d have simply stood on the chair and shouted ‘Gotcha!’ at the top of my voice, but then I suppose that’s why he’s the editor of the Guardian and I’m not).
Also could it not be that Arty up in the first paragraph there was actually actively trying to encourage you into the emergency toothbrush aisle? I mean that comment could be read more than one way…
As as aside… isn’t it great? Everyone on the Guardian must be beaming with pride at the moment. Although why the NOTW offices haven’t been possessed and closed as a crime scene I don’t know.
Never picked up on that with Arty - I thought she was saying “So seeing as we’ve actually known each other face to face for an entire two hours, don’t try anything Looby".
Didn’t read Sshh, but the quality control on this post was excellent - lovely descriptions.
When I see exes or escapees as they are sometimes more properly known, I prefer to think of them not having chosen the current beau over me, so much as having been regularly disappointed by life and having decided to lower their standards for a while. You have to admit, it happens to us all at some point.
[If this comment makes no sense, please excuse it.]
“Escapees", ha ha!
That’s a very good way of looking at it for one’s self-esteem. Occasionally it works the other way round too. With someone, a few years ago, I had to train myself every single day out of the thought that someone so lovely and clever and well-dressed actually cannot possibly like me. I know how grovellingly over-grateful that sounds but it did feel like that for a while, until I became sure that she did (although the wonder never left me).
I have peed myself with laughter at this. No, really - I have. I remember spying on an ex-boyfriend and his new chick and was aggrieved to see that she was not smaller, slimmer, blonder, beautifuler etc etc ….. but she did have an arse the size of Belgium and I was MORTIFIED that he hadn’t preferred me. So, I feel your pain.
I loved your description of ‘a day that ends in a police cell.’ Brilliant :-D
Ali x
Hmm…starting to notice the lure of the big bottom as a bit of a trend here.
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