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And now, inevitably, follows the irritated adjustment back to normal life as my dopamine levels recover. Getting ratty with my eldest for flooding her plate with tomato ketchup. Doing a very poor job of concealing how reluctant I am to accompany my middle daughter to the museum for a Victorian Christmas afternoon, where we're going to play Victorian parlour games and make pomanders. And snapping at a reasonable request from Jenny: "Oh for God's sake, I've only just finished making Melanie's sarnie!"
A long email to Mary-Ann saying, as carefully and with as bright a gloss as I can manage, that this constant not knowing when I will next see her could turn into a bit of a cloud in the long term, as uncertainty turns from pleasant anticipation to everyday frustration.
Talking to myself: "Why the fuck did you get in touch with someone from Leicester, so difficult to get to, and someone so busy, so little free time?" "But I had to. There's no-one in Lancaster. Sitting around here I'll be sexless for ever, until one day, I hear the detested "compliment" about being a good friend one time too many, and I'll leap up and scream at the well-meaning speaker."
I'm impatient for the next chapter: a un-alarm clocked time of physical closeness with the woman who has already seduced me in the way that first attracted me to her: Hello Mary-Ann. I like your hyphens. Knowing that she wants all this as much as me helps not one bit, or even makes it worse, while the date is unnamed.
A doctor writes: This well-documented phase usually lasts about 24-36 hours at the most, during which time the patient is apt to dwell on a more negative view of his experiences than he would normally.
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looby, n.; pl. loobies. A lout; an awkward, stupid, clownish person
M / 61 / Bristol, "the most beautiful, interesting and distinguished city in England" -- John Betjeman [1961, source eludes me].
"Looby is a left-wing intellectual who is obsessed with a) women's clothes and b) tits." -- Joy of Bex.
WLTM literate woman, 40-65. Must have nice tits, a PhD, and an mdma factory in the shed, although the first on its own will do in the short term.
There are plenty of bastards who drink moderately. Of course, I don't consider them to be people. They are not our comrades.
Sergei Korovin, quoted in Pavel Krusanov, The Blue Book of the Alcoholic
I am here to change my life. I am here to force myself to change my life.
Chinese man I met during Freshers Week at Lancaster University, 2008
The more democratised art becomes, the more we recognise in it our own mediocrity.
James Meek
Tell me, why is it that even when we are enjoying music, for instance, or a beautiful evening, or a conversation in agreeable company, it all seems no more than a hint of some infinite felicity existing apart somewhere, rather than actual happiness – such, I mean, as we ourselves can really possess?
Turgenev, Fathers and Sons
I hate the iPod; I hate the idea that music is such a personal thing that you can just stick some earplugs in your ears and have an experience with music. Music is a social phenomenon.
Jeremy Wagner
La vie poetique has its pleasures, and readings--ideally a long way from home--are one of them. I can pretend to be George Szirtes.
George Szirtes
Using words well is a social virtue. Use 'fortuitous' once more to
mean 'fortunate' and you move an English word another step towards
the dustbin. If your mistake took hold, no-one who valued clarity
would be able to use the word again.
John Whale
One good thing about being a Marxist is that you don't have to pretend to like work.
Terry Eagleton, What Is A Novel?, Lancaster University, 1 Feb 2010
The working man is a fucking loser.
Mick, The Golden Lion, Lancaster, 21 Mar 2011
Rummage in my drawers
The Comfort of Strangers
23.1.16: Big clearout of the defunct and dormant and dull
16.1.19: Further pruning
If your comment box looks like this, I'm afraid I sometimes can't be bothered with all that palarver just to leave a comment.
63 mago
Another Angry Voice
the asshat lounge
Clutter From The Gutter
Crinklybee Defunct
Exile on Pain Street
Fat Man On A Keyboard
gairnet provides: press of blll
George Szirtes ditto
Infomaniac [NSFW]
Laudator Temporis Acti
Leeds's Singing Organ-Grinder
On The Rocks
The Most Difficult Thing Ever nothing since April
Quillette
Strange Flowers
Wonky Words
"Just sit still and listen" - woman to teenage girl at Elliott Carter weekend, London 2006
5:4Bristol New Music
Desiring Progress Collection of links only
NewMusicBox
Purposeful Listening (né The Rambler)
Resonance FM
Sequenza 21
Sound and Music
Talking Musicology defunct, but retained
