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Unfortunately, on this occasion

  Wed 29th February 2012

It was for a bit of part-time EFL teaching.

I have:

Two good humanities degrees
Qualified school teacher
Certificate in Teaching English as a Foreign Language (taken in Lisbon)
Experience in teaching children and adults in the UK and abroad
Conversational French and Portuguese
Never ill
Understated but classy dress sense

It wasn't asked of me, but since they also lay on a bit of a social and sporting programme, I mentioned the fact that I am a qualified FA referee for under-14 games. Yes, the pupils would be over 14, but I could have organised Chinese Economics Students XI v Malaysian Trainee Doctors XI. have not been shortlisted for interview. May we take this opportunity of thanking you for your interest in working for the University and to wish you success in the future.

Probably shouldn't have slightly taken the piss out of their question about "coping under stress" by referring to the years I spent on the railway with thousands of lives passing through my hands every day and having three teenage daughters.

I'm going to get my spies to tell me who got the job. A "nice", docile twentysomething woman, I'll bet. The members of the young female adminstrative cadre that runs universities these days probably feel uneasy about interviewing a man twice their age, let alone managing him.

My rent's going up in April; I'm fairly certain that me and Mary-Ann have come to the end of the road. Today had better improve sharpish.

In happier news, Neil, who has featured here recently in posts about when I kissed a man and I liked it, has been invited to be a contributor to the Guardian!


Comment from: Furtheron [Visitor]

Life sadly is often in a word shite

Ever considered a career change? Gigalo perhaps?

Wed 29th February 2012 @ 09:54
Comment from: [Member]

I’ve considered escorting from time to time.

By the way I’m very sorry for the months-old omission in not linking to you. Corrected now. You’re in very good company, in between Get To The Pub (for a lemonade :) ) and Hestia’s lovely Larder.

Wed 29th February 2012 @ 10:22
Comment from: [Member]

i almost wish professional interviews were conducted in the blind – interviewees in a booth, with one of those voice changer things, so the interview panel wouldn’t know age, race, gender or disability…

Wed 29th February 2012 @ 12:15

Don’t go looking for who got the position. To what result? It’ll end in hatred. Do your chant. Let it go. Ommmm…

Thu 1st March 2012 @ 01:40
Comment from: [Member]

I’d have even liked the chance to have an interview! I think that there’s a bit of ageism going on. It’s not the first time I suspect they never go further than the box in which it asks for my date of birth. And asking for feedback is pointless. Not happy.

I’m going to find who got it simply because at some point they need to answer a Freedom of Information request about their recruitment practices, broken down by age and gender.

Thu 1st March 2012 @ 07:38
Comment from: young at heart [Visitor]

am having rubbish day……now am laughing i thank you….I can’t quite put my finger on it, maybe it’s the tone, whatever it is you do make me smile!!

Thu 1st March 2012 @ 16:49
Comment from: readers [Visitor]

the role may have been filled internally. It happens with jobs we advertise too.

Fri 2nd March 2012 @ 09:56
Comment from: [Member]

The curse of the Internal Applicant! I would of course be complimenting such a system were I her.

Fri 2nd March 2012 @ 17:18

You’re obviously over-qualified for this post, and yes, even any slightly humorous remark results in a serious mark-down. **very bitter experience**

Try for a special shag with M-A.
Suggest somehwere really romantic and secluded (Morecambe?) and proceed to bonk both your brains out.
Either kill or cure.

I hope that Neil is a gentleman and doesn’t “kiss and tell”

Sat 3rd March 2012 @ 00:59
Comment from: [Member]

M-A…. I wish I could meet someone local who I can go to the pictures or go out dancing (especially go out dancing) and then go back and have a nice night of frisky fucking which might work, but we’ll just laugh and enjoy eaach others’ body anyway. Can’t do that in Lancaster though.

Fuck, this should be a post on its own.

Sun 4th March 2012 @ 22:18
Comment from: isbw [Visitor]

It should. I’m really curious about the Women of Lancaster. Are they ALL so undesirable/unsuitable?

Tue 6th March 2012 @ 15:57
Comment from: [Member]

You eliminate the ones who don’t fancy you, or the other way around: that lops a huge percentage off. You eliminate the married or spoken for, since most women in their 40s to early 60s, are taken.

Obviously you discount the clean living, the Christians, the teetoallers, the depressives.

Then you eliminate the ones who want you to be tall, have money and a career. I am “none of the above".

From the almost infinitesimally small number remaining, you then eliminate the nutcases who, for example, a few months in, go through your phone and send horrible texts to a friend.

And you find there’s no-one left. I’d love to be proven wrong but I’ve been looking for a girlfriend round here for years. It’s a shame. A local girl would be great.

Tue 6th March 2012 @ 16:58
Comment from: Sarsparilla [Visitor]

Maybe you’re being a bit picky? (ducks)

Tue 6th March 2012 @ 19:46
Comment from: [Member]

I want a clever, literate, gorgeously fuckable, outgoing, chatty woman 30-63ish who is as dirty as fuck, in thought, word, and deed. I think that’s a reasonable request. I realise that other people think that’s over-ambitious. But even a much scaled down version of that list is impossible here - I know because I have tried for years and years - and I don’t want someone who’ll do, a compromise girlfriend.

Tue 6th March 2012 @ 23:40

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