The phenomenological turn in Alsatian architectural theory

Trina and I have an arrangment, that on the conclusion of congress, I will, if necessary, withdraw to the "fish finger"--that is, the old sofa cushion which serves as a makeshift bed and can be set up in the living room--in order to let her snore in peace and me sleep in a similarly restful condition.

On our return from Strasbourg, therefore, and once full relations had produced the desired outcome, I took myself downstairs. As I arrived in the living room, which is adjacent to the kitchen, I noticed that the old fridge was unusually noisy. I shut the door to the kitchen, curled up in my single bed and began to turn over, in my drunken head, pleasant thoughts of some of the features of the Alsatian urban fabric that I found particularly stimulating last week.

An attractive example of a Strasbourgeois pavement

I woke up in the middle of night, the fridge still making an irritatingly loud effort to cool my tins of Electric Pear cider (best before end October 2012). I clamped the communicating door fast shut and tried to think about pavements.

At about seven in the morning, Trina came down as she had to return to her obligations. Once she had left, I went to investigate the source of the sound. I had been wrong to accuse my fridge.

Ten or so doors down, an alarm was carelessly piercing the street with its oscillating tones. There was a sign in the window saying that the house is to rent, and a mobile number. The man at the other end put the phone down on me as I was politely requesting that someone come round and turn the alarm off.

I rang the Police and the Environmental Health Department. Half an hour later it suddenly stopped, so I went out immediately to stick my oar in check that everything was OK. I felt like a Man of Action as I walked down the road with my mobile in one hand, hoping that people were watching me.

With his refined sensitivity and artistic bent, Oxfam chic shirts and utter cluelessness when handed a spanner, Looby is often placed in the Friendzone by some girls and presumed gay by others. But a revelatory new film depicts a man who--behind a Huysmanesque presentation of his self in everyday life--has sorted out four women and an irritating noise this year alone. Andrzej Wadja's neo-realist essay Man of Action follows Looby as he BEDS a Senior Lecturer in Croatian Photosynthesis; CHARMS another with his souffle aux cerises; and TAKES CHARGE when a faulty alarm causes distress to his more timid and retiring neighbours. In selected cinemas from Thursday.