Gay Nazi Sex Vicar in Schoolgirl Knickers Vice Disco Lawnmower Shock!
« The Empty QuarterAshes to ashes »

Not on the Irish Sea

  Mon 24th September 2012

At the moment, Trina and I should be roughly here

Not here

on this romantically-named ship, the Ben-my-chree, or "Girl of My Heart"

Girl of my heart

and trying not to waste good Prosecco by vomiting it into the Irish Sea on what would have been a bit of a lively crossing, as it's wet and windy here today, even ashore.

At 7.40 this morning I got a text. "Very bad news I'm afraid." The relative who was due to look after Trina's mum in her absence has bad diarrhoea which he contracted in Granada at the weekend. First they come and walk five abreast with rucksacks, speaking their bastard version of Portuguese; now they send us their colds. I feel flat, free time which I'd rather not have. All my problems come back now.

Trina, noticing that I was moistened in parts after the Cross Bay Walk, bought me a brand new, proper, outdoor jacket off ebay. I've never had such a thing before, as my flânerie from bar opening to poetry reading to gallery preview requires only my pure new wool grey jacket, £15 from Tatty Bon in Glasgow. But for breasting heavy Manx rain, I need my pressie from Trina, with its little drawing of a jagged mountain and the word "titanium" on the inside label.

So, instead of pictures from Ben-my-chree and Ellan Vannin, I will leave you with a two-part miscellany.

I work as a receptionist at Really Late. I find that I know, on an acquaintance level, about two-thirds of the people who seek counselling. I have been trained in this and I know I must behave exactly towards such people as I did before I started working for Really Late. That's easier said than done for someone like me with his relentless personal curiosity.

I like working at Really Late. I empathise with its aims and I have a silent compassion for the clients. The counsellors are political, aiming to change behaviour with words and ideas, but with a sense of their limits, where other agencies might need to get involved; but they play no part in the economy of Narcissism that exists in an over-educated city like Lancaster, where unqualified Merry-Andrews leech on people with no material problems, in order to talk vicariously about themselves. Unlike bloggers, of course.

So as I sit here drinking the poor man's champagne, and missing Trina very much, wishing I could nuzzle her, wanting her fingers curling round the back of my ear, she turning me feline as she strokes the nape of my neck, and wishing we could half-shout down the prom against a hooded soundtrack of spattered raindrops, and have a mediocre meal in a pub in Douglas with swirly carpets and bored staff--I will leave you with what I think is the best joke, or perhaps, piece of English self-commentary, of the year so far.

An amateur group of Islamic filmmakers have posted a video on YouTube which mocks Christianity and Jesus Christ. It is believed to be so offensive that St Peter's church in Shrewsbury have postponed their tea and cake morning until Wednesday week, and Dorothy Green from Margate has written in to Points of View. When will the madness end?


Bit of a downer having to miss that trip. I hope that you and Trina have only postponed and not cancelled.

I too used to suffer from an intense personal curiosity, but I once asked too many questions and was cured by a punch in the face.

HAHA, I like the analogy, although I doubt that most C of E parishioners would get excited enough by ANYTHING to actually postpone a tea and cake morning. I bet it was seed cake.

Mon 24th September 2012 @ 18:23
Comment from: [Member]

para 2: Not surprised you got a thump. People bridle at personal questions up there, thinking all the time “Is he trying to find out whether I’m a Tim or a Proddy?” not realising that no-one south of Motherwell gives a shit. I like Glasgow but it is a bit backward, like rightwing Islam with lager.

The holiday–Trina rang the hotel and the ferry company, and got it all sorted to change it to 5-7 Nov (when the Irish Sea is famously calm and the weather is balmy). I text Kirsty to tell her this, and relax, whilst still missing Trina.

Then Kirsty informs me that I’d forgotten that I’ve got the girls all that week while she’s in Italy. Bugger!

Mon 24th September 2012 @ 20:42
Comment from: [Member]

hoping you can get things sorted and rescheduled… nothing like a good holiday to cure whatever ails you (unless you are prone to seasickness, that is).

“Unlike bloggers, of course.”


Tue 25th September 2012 @ 02:27
Comment from: [Member]

We’ll do our best to reschedule but I can’t see how we can do it this year now unfortunately.

Tue 25th September 2012 @ 09:56

I’ve never heard of Really Late. I had to Google it but came up answerless. Mind your international audience, please. Can you believe Google is a verb?

Absence makes the heart softer and the nether regions harder. Yes, I went there.

Tue 25th September 2012 @ 11:59
Comment from: [Member]

Sorry for the confusion but because of the type of work it does it’s best I take a conservative view of their code of conduct and keep any discussions away from search engines. However, the link’s in your email.

I’m a little surprised how much I’m missing Trina this week.

Tue 25th September 2012 @ 12:25

Form is loading...

looby, n.; pl. loobies. A lout; an awkward, stupid, clownish person

M / 60 / Bristol, "the most beautiful, interesting and distinguished city in England" -- John Betjeman [1961, source eludes me].

"Looby is a left-wing intellectual who is obsessed with a) women's clothes and b) tits." -- Joy of Bex.

WLTM literate woman, 40-65. Must have nice tits, a PhD, and an mdma factory in the shed, although the first on its own will do in the short term.

There are plenty of bastards who drink moderately. Of course, I don't consider them to be people. They are not our comrades.
Sergei Korovin, quoted in Pavel Krusanov, The Blue Book of the Alcoholic

I am here to change my life. I am here to force myself to change my life.
Chinese man I met during Freshers Week at Lancaster University, 2008

The more democratised art becomes, the more we recognise in it our own mediocrity.
James Meek

Tell me, why is it that even when we are enjoying music, for instance, or a beautiful evening, or a conversation in agreeable company, it all seems no more than a hint of some infinite felicity existing apart somewhere, rather than actual happiness – such, I mean, as we ourselves can really possess?
Turgenev, Fathers and Sons

I hate the iPod; I hate the idea that music is such a personal thing that you can just stick some earplugs in your ears and have an experience with music. Music is a social phenomenon.
Jeremy Wagner

La vie poetique has its pleasures, and readings--ideally a long way from home--are one of them. I can pretend to be George Szirtes.
George Szirtes

Using words well is a social virtue. Use 'fortuitous' once more to mean 'fortunate' and you move an English word another step towards the dustbin. If your mistake took hold, no-one who valued clarity would be able to use the word again.
John Whale

One good thing about being a Marxist is that you don't have to pretend to like work.
Terry Eagleton, What Is A Novel?, Lancaster University, 1 Feb 2010

The working man is a fucking loser.
Mick, The Golden Lion, Lancaster, 21 Mar 2011

The Comfort of Strangers

23.1.16: Big clearout of the defunct and dormant and dull
16.1.19: Further pruning

If your comment box looks like this, I'm afraid I sometimes can't be bothered with all that palarver just to leave a comment.

63 mago
Another Angry Voice
the asshat lounge
Clutter From The Gutter
Eryl Shields Ink
Exile on Pain Street
Fat Man On A Keyboard
gairnet provides: press of blll defunct, but retained for its quality
George Szirtes ditto
Infomaniac [NSFW]
The Joy of Bex
Laudator Temporis Acti
Leeds's Singing Organ-Grinder
The Most Difficult Thing Ever
Strange Flowers
Trailer Park Refugee
Wonky Words

"Just sit still and listen" - woman to teenage girl at Elliott Carter weekend, London 2006

Bristol New Music
Desiring Progress Collection of links only
The Rambler
Resonance FM
Sequenza 21
Sound and Music
Talking Musicology defunct, but retained

  XML Feeds

powered by an open-source CMS

©2024 by looby. Don't steal anything or you'll have a 9st arts graduate to deal with.

Contact | Help | b2evo skin by Asevo | evoCore